Diversified Writer
2 min readSep 28

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Dave and Vinny: Independence

The Rampant Horse was a bustling hive of activity. That is until Vinny makes an entrance. Then all eyes turn his way. He bends down and unclips Scrapps lead, everybody gasps. Vinny you see is wearing a kilt with bugger all underneath. Old Sandra in the corner drinking her snowball nearly fainted as she sees Vinny bend down.
Dave, who is completely unphazed by anything Vinny does waves his empty glass at his friend. Vinny gets a round in, after recieving a stern telling off from Ken about nudity in public.

Vinny sits and passes Dave his beer.
"Evening Vinny. That was quite the entrance. Some things cannot be unseen."
Vinny sipped his pint.
"Oh the kilt you mean?"
"Yes, the kilt. I didn't even know you had Scottish blood in your veins."
"I don't."
"Then why the bloody kilt?"
"I came straight from my new girlfriends. She's into roleplaying. I had to be what's his name. Braveheart fella."
"Mel Gibson?"
"No William Wallace."
"Same difference. Did you wield a claymore?"
"I offered but she said one was massive weapon was enough for her to handle."
Dave spat out his beer.
"A mental image I did NOT need Vinny."
Vinny grinned and stood up then went to the gents. Two minutes later Lecherous Lee emerged from the gents shaking his head in disbelief.
He remarked to Ken, "Some things you can't unsee."
Vinny came back sat down and sipped his pint.
"So what do you think of Scottish Independence Vin?" Asked Dave.
Vinny thought a moment.
"Can't say I blame them. Those greedy cunts in Westminster should not control the life of Morag in Inverness. I'd go further.'
"Oh?"
"I'm for Yorkshire independence too ."
"I'll drink to that!!"

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Diversified Writer

Darren is a short story and novella writer. He likes tall tales that have humour and heart. He’ll occasionally bring you poetry, finance and health blog posts.